vancityrockgirl
skills include drinking, smoking and swearing
technorati
vancityrockgirl
i really have nothing good for a title.
ah solitude.
it can be blissful.
so, my coworkers are all on holiday and the other one left at 2pm...
i am all alone in my office until 6pm.
the upside is that i have changed the radio station to something i like.
the downside is that there is no way of getting out of work early.
i must stay until the bitter end.
this weekend may have its fair share of solitude as well.
seems like most everyone i know, including my husband, is out of town.
so i have a lovely 3 day weekend... and no one to play with.
i have mixed emotions on this.
on one hand, i do enjoy a little time alone here and there...
but on the other hand, its the last long weekend of the summer.
my last chance to swim in lakes and lay on beaches and drink in nature under the sunshine...
so i feel like i should be doing *something* to commemorate the death of summer.
but alas. my non driving makes an end of summer escape impossible... not that its really a huge factor, since my husband has taken our only car to the states until monday anyways.
but the lack of a drivers license certainly isn't helping the situation.
so i suppose this is a sign from the gods to be solo this weekend.
maybe i concentrate on getting things done around the house... cleaning, maybe cooking... grocery shopping... exercising a little. watching twilight without the eye rolling from the other end of the couch...
you know. housewife stuff.
what else does one do on a solo long weekend?
no really. that's a real question.
this morning i had a shorty swim.
my motivation and overall physical feeling has been pretty low this week.
so after 30 minutes of lengths i was done.
i'm full of aches and pains.
today its my wrist.
which seems like nothing, but for both swimming and a job that involves a lot of typing, its not great to have pain there.
i'm just starting to feel really grumpy about my aches and pains.
its frustrating.
generally speaking, most of it isn't really bad to inhibit me from doing things... it just makes the things that i do into a not-pleasurable experience.
its like those little constant nagging pains... like the headache thats a dull thud.
basically it sucks.
what it has done, is really make me think about my body and its limitations.
and now that i've been tasked with really watching my liquid intake... its made me super conscious about the choices i'm making.
you know what else is totally not helping?
that michael pollan book; the omnivore's dilemma.
now as much as i loathe to be one of those people that reads a book and then starts getting all preachy and adopts the author's opinions...
well, if you're not affected by reading this stuff, then you're not really reading it.
this book is interesting.
extremely interesting.
as a food lover, i think a lot about food.
i read a lot about food.
i talk a lot about food.
but the topics covered in this book are ones that, for the most part, i've never delved into.
and this fascinates me.
my husband has already braced himself for the inevitable onslaught of "things i now think we should do or not do"
and the first ones have started trickling in...
resolution #1 - only buying grass fed beef.
resolution #2 - don't buy things just because they're organic.
the first one takes a long time to go into... but the second one is pretty easy.
but i have definitely fallen into the hands of the marketing masterminds of organic goods.
organic is not a guarantee of quality.
no. seriously. its not.
it doesn't mean that the product is better, less processed, more sustainable... or even healthier.
instead of assuming that an organic label means i've made the best choice... i need to start thinking about what i'm buying.
important factors to me: avoiding processed foods. sustainability. local connections.
if i buy some organic blackberries trucked in from mexico, is that really a better decision than the non organic blackberries from 20 miles away?
no. its most definitely not.
sure, i may not have been exposed to pesticides, but what about the horrific carbon footprint that the mexican organic produce has made on its way to my market?
how many barrels of oil did it take to get that to me? the answer is more sickening than the trace pesticides on the fruit from here.
local products are already something my husband and i are pretty serious about.
when we shop, we look at stickers on produce and only buy bc products unless its something we need and is absolutely unavoidable to not buy local.
like the almighty avocado. they don't grow dem here. and they are delicious.
we don't buy california strawberries when i can get them from bc.
we don't buy peppers, tomatoes, cucumber and other veggies unless they're bc hothouse grown.
and if we're given an option from california or from florida, we take the california.
but our commitment to this has never really surpassed the fresh aisles.
which is going to change.
i've always loved the idea of the 100 mile diet... and i know its not really super practical for people that don't have a lot of time to devote to their food habits... but just because you maybe can't do it 24/7 doesn't mean that you shouldn't try at all.
obviously this plan has fatal flaws.
for one, my love of mexican food.
those spices and products come from mexico. and thats like... real far away.
but i can use those products combined with my local goods.
see? easy as pie!
anyways, this thinking applies to all things... food, clothing, liquor... anything you buy really.
buying local is better for so many reasons.
support the local producers and keep your carbon footprint in check.
everyone wins.
so i *am* really trying not to let these books make me into a jerk... but its expanding my brain and challenging me to think about what i'm doing and the choices i make.
one of the few votes that we have that really "counts" is how we spend our money.
when we choose to spend or not spend money in places, it makes a difference.
so i say... power to the people!
it can be blissful.
so, my coworkers are all on holiday and the other one left at 2pm...
i am all alone in my office until 6pm.
the upside is that i have changed the radio station to something i like.
the downside is that there is no way of getting out of work early.
i must stay until the bitter end.
this weekend may have its fair share of solitude as well.
seems like most everyone i know, including my husband, is out of town.
so i have a lovely 3 day weekend... and no one to play with.
i have mixed emotions on this.
on one hand, i do enjoy a little time alone here and there...
but on the other hand, its the last long weekend of the summer.
my last chance to swim in lakes and lay on beaches and drink in nature under the sunshine...
so i feel like i should be doing *something* to commemorate the death of summer.
but alas. my non driving makes an end of summer escape impossible... not that its really a huge factor, since my husband has taken our only car to the states until monday anyways.
but the lack of a drivers license certainly isn't helping the situation.
so i suppose this is a sign from the gods to be solo this weekend.
maybe i concentrate on getting things done around the house... cleaning, maybe cooking... grocery shopping... exercising a little. watching twilight without the eye rolling from the other end of the couch...
you know. housewife stuff.
what else does one do on a solo long weekend?
no really. that's a real question.
this morning i had a shorty swim.
my motivation and overall physical feeling has been pretty low this week.
so after 30 minutes of lengths i was done.
i'm full of aches and pains.
today its my wrist.
which seems like nothing, but for both swimming and a job that involves a lot of typing, its not great to have pain there.
i'm just starting to feel really grumpy about my aches and pains.
its frustrating.
generally speaking, most of it isn't really bad to inhibit me from doing things... it just makes the things that i do into a not-pleasurable experience.
its like those little constant nagging pains... like the headache thats a dull thud.
basically it sucks.
what it has done, is really make me think about my body and its limitations.
and now that i've been tasked with really watching my liquid intake... its made me super conscious about the choices i'm making.
you know what else is totally not helping?
that michael pollan book; the omnivore's dilemma.
now as much as i loathe to be one of those people that reads a book and then starts getting all preachy and adopts the author's opinions...
well, if you're not affected by reading this stuff, then you're not really reading it.
this book is interesting.
extremely interesting.
as a food lover, i think a lot about food.
i read a lot about food.
i talk a lot about food.
but the topics covered in this book are ones that, for the most part, i've never delved into.
and this fascinates me.
my husband has already braced himself for the inevitable onslaught of "things i now think we should do or not do"
and the first ones have started trickling in...
resolution #1 - only buying grass fed beef.
resolution #2 - don't buy things just because they're organic.
the first one takes a long time to go into... but the second one is pretty easy.
but i have definitely fallen into the hands of the marketing masterminds of organic goods.
organic is not a guarantee of quality.
no. seriously. its not.
it doesn't mean that the product is better, less processed, more sustainable... or even healthier.
instead of assuming that an organic label means i've made the best choice... i need to start thinking about what i'm buying.
important factors to me: avoiding processed foods. sustainability. local connections.
if i buy some organic blackberries trucked in from mexico, is that really a better decision than the non organic blackberries from 20 miles away?
no. its most definitely not.
sure, i may not have been exposed to pesticides, but what about the horrific carbon footprint that the mexican organic produce has made on its way to my market?
how many barrels of oil did it take to get that to me? the answer is more sickening than the trace pesticides on the fruit from here.
local products are already something my husband and i are pretty serious about.
when we shop, we look at stickers on produce and only buy bc products unless its something we need and is absolutely unavoidable to not buy local.
like the almighty avocado. they don't grow dem here. and they are delicious.
we don't buy california strawberries when i can get them from bc.
we don't buy peppers, tomatoes, cucumber and other veggies unless they're bc hothouse grown.
and if we're given an option from california or from florida, we take the california.
but our commitment to this has never really surpassed the fresh aisles.
which is going to change.
i've always loved the idea of the 100 mile diet... and i know its not really super practical for people that don't have a lot of time to devote to their food habits... but just because you maybe can't do it 24/7 doesn't mean that you shouldn't try at all.
obviously this plan has fatal flaws.
for one, my love of mexican food.
those spices and products come from mexico. and thats like... real far away.
but i can use those products combined with my local goods.
see? easy as pie!
anyways, this thinking applies to all things... food, clothing, liquor... anything you buy really.
buying local is better for so many reasons.
support the local producers and keep your carbon footprint in check.
everyone wins.
so i *am* really trying not to let these books make me into a jerk... but its expanding my brain and challenging me to think about what i'm doing and the choices i make.
one of the few votes that we have that really "counts" is how we spend our money.
when we choose to spend or not spend money in places, it makes a difference.
so i say... power to the people!
ya i'm down, but not out and far from done.
well, the downside of the tuesday-saturday work week is that thursday is my hump day.
and wowsa, it really feels like it.
one could say i'm in a bit of a slump.
last night i came home to a an amazing coq au vin simmering on the stove, courtesy of my wonderful husband...
and a glass of wine poured and waiting.
gee, someone forgot that i'm not supposed to be drinking!
ya, so i had 3 glasses of wine and about 10 cigarettes as i sat on the patio until 11pm and talked with my guy while he drank fine rums.
which was all well and good until i had to get up this morning.
it did not go well.
i got up and it was COLD outside.
and i have no idea what to wear for cold weather running.
but i think i did okay with just layering.
anyways, the run itself didn't go so well.
after about 16 minutes the pain in my knees, hips and ankles was unbearable and i had to call it.
it's officially the first interval of my training that i haven't completed.
i'm pretty bummed about it.
soooo... i guess i'll work on swimming and maybe hit the gym for some non-running activities and give my body some time to catch up and recover for a week or two.
and maybe start fresh with treadmill running, since it seems to be easier on my joints.
basically right now my entire body is crying for a soak in the hot tub.
every part of my lower body is achy and in various degrees of pain.
it sucks. i feel old.
i know that its a minor miracle that my body hadn't given up on all this exercise earlier, but i had my fingers crossed that maybe i could fool it into thinking i'm 19 again.
lol. yaaaa... that didn't go so well.
the fact is that i'm 31 in a few months and it takes me longer to heal and its easier to injure myself.
and high impact activities like running are maybe not the wisest idea i've ever had.
anyways, i'm down but not out.
and i hope i'll be back at-er for next week.
so, over to the complaints department.
may i share my frustration with the way doctors in this province operate?
what the hell is up with this policy of "if you don't hear from us, everything is fine"
seriously. worst policy ever.
so you were concerned enough about my current state that you made me take time from work to go get various tests run... but you can't even place a phone call to tell me what the results were?
what. the. fuck?
this is THE WORST policy EVER.
its frustrated me for years...
and i called my doctor's office on monday to see about my results from last week's testing and the receptionist basically said she couldn't tell me anything, but if i hadn't received a phone call from them, then i can assume there was nothing unusual in the tests.
pardon me, but isn't the entire reason i went to the doctor so that i didn't have to ASSUME anything about my health?
so i could receive a diagnosis and be treated?
not go for tests, get no real answers and "assume" i'll sort myself out.
i could have done that without a doctor's visit.
it boggles the mind.
like seriously, a phone call is all i'm asking for.
tell me some bullshit about my hemoglobin and other things that i won't fully understand... but at least acknowledge that i went for tests and the tests either told you whats going on... or i still don't have a concrete answer as to what is going on.
last year i had the same thing.
i was pretty sick and run down and various things were paining me and so i went for a LOT of tests.
everything from the breathing into a test tube thing to blood work to paps and internal exams.
fun times, let me tell you.
took literally an entire day to get everything all done.
and what happened?
well, i can't tell you.
BECAUSE I NEVER HEARD BACK.
it makes me mental.
in my job we have what we call "minimum standards"
meaning that there are certain things that you MUST do for clients to keep your job.
all the minimum standards must be met and exceeding them is encouraged.
i think its time for doctors to get some minimum standards.
and placing a phone call to your patient to follow up on testing should be one of them.
heck, send me an email. i really don't care.
just some sort of response that says, yes we got your results, here's what they were. be worried, don't be worried or we're sending you for more tests.
done.
my mom told me that now there's a web site that you can access your test results at so that you can see what happened.
i guess i'm going to have to look into that and i dunno... google my own diagnosis.
fucking hell.
i know our medical system is grossly underfunded, but has it really come to this?
guess so.
paging dr google.
and wowsa, it really feels like it.
one could say i'm in a bit of a slump.
last night i came home to a an amazing coq au vin simmering on the stove, courtesy of my wonderful husband...
and a glass of wine poured and waiting.
gee, someone forgot that i'm not supposed to be drinking!
ya, so i had 3 glasses of wine and about 10 cigarettes as i sat on the patio until 11pm and talked with my guy while he drank fine rums.
which was all well and good until i had to get up this morning.
it did not go well.
i got up and it was COLD outside.
and i have no idea what to wear for cold weather running.
but i think i did okay with just layering.
anyways, the run itself didn't go so well.
after about 16 minutes the pain in my knees, hips and ankles was unbearable and i had to call it.
it's officially the first interval of my training that i haven't completed.
i'm pretty bummed about it.
soooo... i guess i'll work on swimming and maybe hit the gym for some non-running activities and give my body some time to catch up and recover for a week or two.
and maybe start fresh with treadmill running, since it seems to be easier on my joints.
basically right now my entire body is crying for a soak in the hot tub.
every part of my lower body is achy and in various degrees of pain.
it sucks. i feel old.
i know that its a minor miracle that my body hadn't given up on all this exercise earlier, but i had my fingers crossed that maybe i could fool it into thinking i'm 19 again.
lol. yaaaa... that didn't go so well.
the fact is that i'm 31 in a few months and it takes me longer to heal and its easier to injure myself.
and high impact activities like running are maybe not the wisest idea i've ever had.
anyways, i'm down but not out.
and i hope i'll be back at-er for next week.
so, over to the complaints department.
may i share my frustration with the way doctors in this province operate?
what the hell is up with this policy of "if you don't hear from us, everything is fine"
seriously. worst policy ever.
so you were concerned enough about my current state that you made me take time from work to go get various tests run... but you can't even place a phone call to tell me what the results were?
what. the. fuck?
this is THE WORST policy EVER.
its frustrated me for years...
and i called my doctor's office on monday to see about my results from last week's testing and the receptionist basically said she couldn't tell me anything, but if i hadn't received a phone call from them, then i can assume there was nothing unusual in the tests.
pardon me, but isn't the entire reason i went to the doctor so that i didn't have to ASSUME anything about my health?
so i could receive a diagnosis and be treated?
not go for tests, get no real answers and "assume" i'll sort myself out.
i could have done that without a doctor's visit.
it boggles the mind.
like seriously, a phone call is all i'm asking for.
tell me some bullshit about my hemoglobin and other things that i won't fully understand... but at least acknowledge that i went for tests and the tests either told you whats going on... or i still don't have a concrete answer as to what is going on.
last year i had the same thing.
i was pretty sick and run down and various things were paining me and so i went for a LOT of tests.
everything from the breathing into a test tube thing to blood work to paps and internal exams.
fun times, let me tell you.
took literally an entire day to get everything all done.
and what happened?
well, i can't tell you.
BECAUSE I NEVER HEARD BACK.
it makes me mental.
in my job we have what we call "minimum standards"
meaning that there are certain things that you MUST do for clients to keep your job.
all the minimum standards must be met and exceeding them is encouraged.
i think its time for doctors to get some minimum standards.
and placing a phone call to your patient to follow up on testing should be one of them.
heck, send me an email. i really don't care.
just some sort of response that says, yes we got your results, here's what they were. be worried, don't be worried or we're sending you for more tests.
done.
my mom told me that now there's a web site that you can access your test results at so that you can see what happened.
i guess i'm going to have to look into that and i dunno... google my own diagnosis.
fucking hell.
i know our medical system is grossly underfunded, but has it really come to this?
guess so.
paging dr google.
the morning fog may chill the air, i don't care!
this morning was a bit of a fail.
i woke up at 5am and the place where my thigh bone connects to the hip bone is freaking sore.
i must have pulled a muscle.
and that sucks.
its feeling better right now, but overall just sore.
so i bailed on swimming this morning.
bad girl. i know.
but tomorrow i'm looking forward to my run outside...
because now i can see that the precious last few days of outdoor running are on the horizon.
i know that i will not run in the gross rain.
plus i am so freaking clumsy.
running on a slick sidewalk is just asking for trouble for me.
and i know that when my bed is warm and dry and the outdoors is cold and wet, i will not be motivated to make that go.
another reason... it's going to be dark still.
i don't think it's particularly safe for a girl to be running around with headphones on in the dark and rain alone.
so when the weather gets gross, i will be taking advantage of the gym in my building.
hey, it's warm, dry and free.
and like 20 second of a walk from my condo.
so, no excuses.
but for now, i'm planning on kicking it in the outdoors until the rain forces me inside.
so fingers are crossed for sun tomorrow.
speaking of which, i am kinda in shock that its september.
i hate being that person that complains about the weather... but honestly, its hard to call what we just had a "real summer"
my biggest barometer; my tomato plants.
one gave 4 tomatoes. the other didn't have a single one.
you know why?
no consistent sun.
in fact, my entire patio garden looks like shit from being cold, then hot, then cold again.
it's kinda sad actually.
ah well. thems the breaks.
thanks climate change.
so, in other news...
my san francisco vacation is fast approaching.
it's just over a month away...
we've had to tighten up our budget and ditch out my dreams of trips to nearby towns and wine country.
and instead we're going to walk our asses off and do a lot of free sightseeing.
i don't mind.
san fran is a beautiful city.
and there is much to walk around and see for free or cheap.
it will be foggy and cold and misty and lovely.
i'm excited.
it's the kind of city that makes you want to be bundled up and feeling the ocean spray on your face.
there's not many sights more lovely than the golden gate bridge emerging from the fog cover.
it's been a LONG time since i was in san fran and getting to know the city again is a pretty exciting prospect to me.
i'm excited to see some local culture...
maybe even museums and touristy stuff...
i'm just excited to wander a beautiful city with my friends for 6 days.
we will eat, we will drink and we will laugh.
my heart is warmed already just thinking about it.
suggestions on places to go and things to see are welcome.
we have many days to fill with good times.
i woke up at 5am and the place where my thigh bone connects to the hip bone is freaking sore.
i must have pulled a muscle.
and that sucks.
its feeling better right now, but overall just sore.
so i bailed on swimming this morning.
bad girl. i know.
but tomorrow i'm looking forward to my run outside...
because now i can see that the precious last few days of outdoor running are on the horizon.
i know that i will not run in the gross rain.
plus i am so freaking clumsy.
running on a slick sidewalk is just asking for trouble for me.
and i know that when my bed is warm and dry and the outdoors is cold and wet, i will not be motivated to make that go.
another reason... it's going to be dark still.
i don't think it's particularly safe for a girl to be running around with headphones on in the dark and rain alone.
so when the weather gets gross, i will be taking advantage of the gym in my building.
hey, it's warm, dry and free.
and like 20 second of a walk from my condo.
so, no excuses.
but for now, i'm planning on kicking it in the outdoors until the rain forces me inside.
so fingers are crossed for sun tomorrow.
speaking of which, i am kinda in shock that its september.
i hate being that person that complains about the weather... but honestly, its hard to call what we just had a "real summer"
my biggest barometer; my tomato plants.
one gave 4 tomatoes. the other didn't have a single one.
you know why?
no consistent sun.
in fact, my entire patio garden looks like shit from being cold, then hot, then cold again.
it's kinda sad actually.
ah well. thems the breaks.
thanks climate change.
so, in other news...
my san francisco vacation is fast approaching.
it's just over a month away...
we've had to tighten up our budget and ditch out my dreams of trips to nearby towns and wine country.
and instead we're going to walk our asses off and do a lot of free sightseeing.
i don't mind.
san fran is a beautiful city.
and there is much to walk around and see for free or cheap.
it will be foggy and cold and misty and lovely.
i'm excited.
it's the kind of city that makes you want to be bundled up and feeling the ocean spray on your face.
there's not many sights more lovely than the golden gate bridge emerging from the fog cover.
it's been a LONG time since i was in san fran and getting to know the city again is a pretty exciting prospect to me.
i'm excited to see some local culture...
maybe even museums and touristy stuff...
i'm just excited to wander a beautiful city with my friends for 6 days.
we will eat, we will drink and we will laugh.
my heart is warmed already just thinking about it.
suggestions on places to go and things to see are welcome.
we have many days to fill with good times.
rainy truesdays
ah yes... back to reality.
this weekend was lovely and long. just how i like them.
because i'm going to work this upcoming saturday, i had monday off. which gave me a delightful 3 day weekend.
this was particularly awesome, since i didn't get wasted this weekend, so i actually felt like i had a mega long weekend.
friday i went to see the legend that is joan jett perform at the pne.
it was excellent and i got to eat some yummy pne treats.
specifically from hunky bills, fisher scones and dragon truck.
AND it didn't rain.
pretty happy about all of that.
i even resisted the lure of the beer garden... i waited with my mom and watched her drink 2 glasses of wine, but i stayed strong.
i actually amazed myself a little.
but it can't all be perfect... i did later in the night after a few puffs, succumb to a half glass of white wine.
twice.
so okay, i totally drank a glass of wine.
but not bad for a friday night.
saturday we spent the afternoon and evening with my husband's friends affectionately referred to as "the french"
(they're from france)
we had a nice walk on the beach, hung out and chatted about books and music and movies and nerdy stuff...
and then they fed us the most ridiculous meal that made me super fat instantly, i'm sure.
it was DELICIOUS.
there was fresh baked bread. and things with bacon and eggs and cream and pastry...
ya, pretty awesome.
them french sure do know how to cook.
we also smoked out of this crazy cool vaporizer pipe that is gas powered.
it was kinda magic.
but also like $350.
and so i stick to rollies.
i also succumbed to some booze.
just a little.
like 1/3 of a of beer and 1 oz of port.
sooooo... definitely didn't get drunk, but still, broke my no booze resolution.
sunday was relaxation... the husband and i got high and i baked a carrot cake.
we sat on the patio and hung out...
i made soup.
we ate almost an entire carrot cake.
delightful.
monday i spent my day off running errands with my mom, then we went on an almost 7km power walk.
and i mean POWER WALK.
i actually had to jog at times to keep up. my mom really motors.
but it was a good walk.
and then i went home and ate the rest of the carrot cake.
whoops.
seriously though. this thing was GOOD.
i actually made the recipe properly with no deviation from the recipe.
which is amazing.
especially because this recipe is crazy bad for you, it took a lot of restraint to not try to "healthy it up"
oh, also i'm a LIAR.
instead of 3/4 cup of vegetable oil i had to substitute. because i ran out.
so i used 1/3 cup vegetable oil, 1/3 cup melted butter and 1/3 cup milk.
here's the recipe. it's the bees knees.
pay no attention to how bad it is for you.
because its SO worth it.
Canada's Best Carrot Cake
soooo... since i did good with not drinking... but did real bad with eatinghalf most of a carrot cake...
and now i'm doing penance with exercising.
this morning i ran day 3 of week 6 of the couch 2 5k
- 5 minute warm up
- 25 minutes running
- 5 minutes cool down
because its raining like a mutha fucker outside, i ran at the gym this morning.
it was my first time on the treadmill in about a year and it was... different than running outside.
in some ways easier in others harder.
and definitely boring as all fucking hell.
what i did enjoy is that, well, i stayed dry.
and that i had a distance counter on the machine.
finally, for the first time, i got some sort of glimmer as to where i am at in terms of distance.
so, this morning in 25 minutes, i did 3.5km.
not bad.
not great, but a good starting place.
so if the goal is to be doing 5km in 30 minutes in 3 weeks time, i'm on my way, but definitely have some solid work to do.
gotta pick up my pace.
one thing i've noticed today... and i'm not sure if this is because of the power walk yesterday or the run this morning, but my hips are SORE.
tomorrow is a swimming day, so that should be gentle on my body at least.
also exciting to me... i got a package from amazon.ca with 2 books and the third is due to arrive thursday.
i got my eclipse movie companion (ya ya, yuk it up)
and michael pollan's the omnivore's dilemma which i have just started on the bus this morning.
i've been wanting to read his stuff for a while, but was being lazy... then a few weeks ago, i watched the most fascinating program called "the botany of desire" which is based on his 2004 book of the same name.
and this documentary blew my mind.
so i prioritized buying his books. reviews coming.
tonight i'm looking forward to a visit from CWP on my patio.
many sessions will be had.
and hi-jinks ensue.
go.
this weekend was lovely and long. just how i like them.
because i'm going to work this upcoming saturday, i had monday off. which gave me a delightful 3 day weekend.
this was particularly awesome, since i didn't get wasted this weekend, so i actually felt like i had a mega long weekend.
friday i went to see the legend that is joan jett perform at the pne.
it was excellent and i got to eat some yummy pne treats.
specifically from hunky bills, fisher scones and dragon truck.
AND it didn't rain.
pretty happy about all of that.
i even resisted the lure of the beer garden... i waited with my mom and watched her drink 2 glasses of wine, but i stayed strong.
i actually amazed myself a little.
but it can't all be perfect... i did later in the night after a few puffs, succumb to a half glass of white wine.
twice.
so okay, i totally drank a glass of wine.
but not bad for a friday night.
saturday we spent the afternoon and evening with my husband's friends affectionately referred to as "the french"
(they're from france)
we had a nice walk on the beach, hung out and chatted about books and music and movies and nerdy stuff...
and then they fed us the most ridiculous meal that made me super fat instantly, i'm sure.
it was DELICIOUS.
there was fresh baked bread. and things with bacon and eggs and cream and pastry...
ya, pretty awesome.
them french sure do know how to cook.
we also smoked out of this crazy cool vaporizer pipe that is gas powered.
it was kinda magic.
but also like $350.
and so i stick to rollies.
i also succumbed to some booze.
just a little.
like 1/3 of a of beer and 1 oz of port.
sooooo... definitely didn't get drunk, but still, broke my no booze resolution.
sunday was relaxation... the husband and i got high and i baked a carrot cake.
we sat on the patio and hung out...
i made soup.
we ate almost an entire carrot cake.
delightful.
monday i spent my day off running errands with my mom, then we went on an almost 7km power walk.
and i mean POWER WALK.
i actually had to jog at times to keep up. my mom really motors.
but it was a good walk.
and then i went home and ate the rest of the carrot cake.
whoops.
seriously though. this thing was GOOD.
i actually made the recipe properly with no deviation from the recipe.
which is amazing.
especially because this recipe is crazy bad for you, it took a lot of restraint to not try to "healthy it up"
oh, also i'm a LIAR.
instead of 3/4 cup of vegetable oil i had to substitute. because i ran out.
so i used 1/3 cup vegetable oil, 1/3 cup melted butter and 1/3 cup milk.
here's the recipe. it's the bees knees.
pay no attention to how bad it is for you.
because its SO worth it.
Canada's Best Carrot Cake
soooo... since i did good with not drinking... but did real bad with eating
and now i'm doing penance with exercising.
this morning i ran day 3 of week 6 of the couch 2 5k
- 5 minute warm up
- 25 minutes running
- 5 minutes cool down
because its raining like a mutha fucker outside, i ran at the gym this morning.
it was my first time on the treadmill in about a year and it was... different than running outside.
in some ways easier in others harder.
and definitely boring as all fucking hell.
what i did enjoy is that, well, i stayed dry.
and that i had a distance counter on the machine.
finally, for the first time, i got some sort of glimmer as to where i am at in terms of distance.
so, this morning in 25 minutes, i did 3.5km.
not bad.
not great, but a good starting place.
so if the goal is to be doing 5km in 30 minutes in 3 weeks time, i'm on my way, but definitely have some solid work to do.
gotta pick up my pace.
one thing i've noticed today... and i'm not sure if this is because of the power walk yesterday or the run this morning, but my hips are SORE.
tomorrow is a swimming day, so that should be gentle on my body at least.
also exciting to me... i got a package from amazon.ca with 2 books and the third is due to arrive thursday.
i got my eclipse movie companion (ya ya, yuk it up)
and michael pollan's the omnivore's dilemma which i have just started on the bus this morning.
i've been wanting to read his stuff for a while, but was being lazy... then a few weeks ago, i watched the most fascinating program called "the botany of desire" which is based on his 2004 book of the same name.
and this documentary blew my mind.
so i prioritized buying his books. reviews coming.
tonight i'm looking forward to a visit from CWP on my patio.
many sessions will be had.
and hi-jinks ensue.
go.
new days, new ambitions
you know, my office is a really tranquil place when i get here an hour early.
so you'd think that would facilitate working, but instead i'm going to blog for a few minutes here.
yesterdays doctors appointment was okay...
the usual. not a lot of "answers", but a lot of possibilities as to whats wrong with me.
my doctor doesn't think its serious though, she thinks that i've just simply been over doing it.
so it turns out that my monday resolution of quitting drinking for a while and getting back to the green is probably the best thing for me.
in short, it would appear that my body is burned out.
and severely dehydrated, to the point where my heart is having problems keeping up.
i've been partying and exercising too hard.
and while i thought the exercising was negating the partying...
it turns out that its actually been compounding the damage.
and right now i'm more apt to give up the party than give up the exercise.
end of story.
i've been reminded by today's fall-type weather, that summer is pretty much done.
and right now i'm a few weeks shy of one year from my (re)start of my healthy living.
and i haven't accomplished as much as i'd like to have.
i've lost just over 35lbs - as of today, 36 to be exact, but my goal was 50lbs in one year.
and frankly, i haven't lost a single pound since april.
so while i've done well, its bittersweet because i haven't done as well as i should have, or know i could have if i applied myself.
and a lot of that falls squarely on my drinking.
i now have a hawaii vacation on the horizon and i would very much like to be at my 50lb goal for then.
i have 69 days to reach my new mini goal.
that's almost 10 weeks.
1.4lbs a week? an aggressive target, but not outrageous.
and not one that will be achieved by fucking around, most importantly.
so for the next little while, there will be some huge changes for my health.
and so i'm sorry if that makes me super lame, or makes me into your annoying hippie stoner friend that smokes weed and eats granola...
but i am most definitely off the sauce.
and by the time i'm back from san francisco, i'll be off the cigarettes.
because frankly, the sensation of feeling my heart not working properly may have been enough to scare me straight.
so you'd think that would facilitate working, but instead i'm going to blog for a few minutes here.
yesterdays doctors appointment was okay...
the usual. not a lot of "answers", but a lot of possibilities as to whats wrong with me.
my doctor doesn't think its serious though, she thinks that i've just simply been over doing it.
so it turns out that my monday resolution of quitting drinking for a while and getting back to the green is probably the best thing for me.
in short, it would appear that my body is burned out.
and severely dehydrated, to the point where my heart is having problems keeping up.
i've been partying and exercising too hard.
and while i thought the exercising was negating the partying...
it turns out that its actually been compounding the damage.
and right now i'm more apt to give up the party than give up the exercise.
end of story.
i've been reminded by today's fall-type weather, that summer is pretty much done.
and right now i'm a few weeks shy of one year from my (re)start of my healthy living.
and i haven't accomplished as much as i'd like to have.
i've lost just over 35lbs - as of today, 36 to be exact, but my goal was 50lbs in one year.
and frankly, i haven't lost a single pound since april.
so while i've done well, its bittersweet because i haven't done as well as i should have, or know i could have if i applied myself.
and a lot of that falls squarely on my drinking.
i now have a hawaii vacation on the horizon and i would very much like to be at my 50lb goal for then.
i have 69 days to reach my new mini goal.
that's almost 10 weeks.
1.4lbs a week? an aggressive target, but not outrageous.
and not one that will be achieved by fucking around, most importantly.
so for the next little while, there will be some huge changes for my health.
and so i'm sorry if that makes me super lame, or makes me into your annoying hippie stoner friend that smokes weed and eats granola...
but i am most definitely off the sauce.
and by the time i'm back from san francisco, i'll be off the cigarettes.
because frankly, the sensation of feeling my heart not working properly may have been enough to scare me straight.
say it ain't so...
morning swim
sunshine
half day at work
afternoon hike
turkey burgers at mom's house
these are all things that make me happy today.
this morning, my swimming buddy and i went to do some lengths for about 40 minutes or so... we probably could have done longer, but you know... shit happens.
tomorrow i'm going to run, as long as my doctor clears me.
my dad wants me to get an EKG.
and he said i should get a heart monitor for a few days so they can check me properly.
le sigh.
besides my gallbladder nightmare, i've not really been proper "sick"
which is definitely a good thing.
but i'm not really sure whats going on now.
so its confusing and a bit worrisome.
and its making me a bit stressed out.
which i'm also sure is not helping whats going on.
anyways, i don't *think* its anything serious... but it has been going on for over a week now.
and saturday/sunday was definitely the worst, but its been pretty constant.
and its kinda freaking me out to be honest.
so i guess, here's hoping i'm not dying.
cheery, i know.
so this morning it was revealed to the internet that the new weezer album called "hurley" is not actually the "clever" reference to a LOST character (like this move didn't reek of product placement already), but its actually for the purpose of promoting their joint clothing venue with Hurley clothing.
lame.
no no... LAME.
weezer used to be so damn cool.
pinkerton and the blue album were icons from my formative years.
there's not a single person that i knew that didn't own the blue album.
it's a frigging classic.
and then they turned up the suck knob.
it happened gradually... first there was a hint of sucking, then a little more... then the next thing we knew, it's terrible novelty songs for entire albums.
they went the offspring route.
and that is just a BAD bad idea.
weezer went from being one of those bands that everyone loved, to being a band that no one can stand.
anything made by them in the last 6 years = instant radio turn off.
i don't know a single person that has bought their last few albums.
and now they have done the ultimate "sell out" move and quite literally SOLD themselves.
they sold the damn title of their album for product placement.
the weez is dead to me now.
way to go rivers. you fucked up.
hard.
nerd.
sunshine
half day at work
afternoon hike
turkey burgers at mom's house
these are all things that make me happy today.
this morning, my swimming buddy and i went to do some lengths for about 40 minutes or so... we probably could have done longer, but you know... shit happens.
tomorrow i'm going to run, as long as my doctor clears me.
my dad wants me to get an EKG.
and he said i should get a heart monitor for a few days so they can check me properly.
le sigh.
besides my gallbladder nightmare, i've not really been proper "sick"
which is definitely a good thing.
but i'm not really sure whats going on now.
so its confusing and a bit worrisome.
and its making me a bit stressed out.
which i'm also sure is not helping whats going on.
anyways, i don't *think* its anything serious... but it has been going on for over a week now.
and saturday/sunday was definitely the worst, but its been pretty constant.
and its kinda freaking me out to be honest.
so i guess, here's hoping i'm not dying.
cheery, i know.
so this morning it was revealed to the internet that the new weezer album called "hurley" is not actually the "clever" reference to a LOST character (like this move didn't reek of product placement already), but its actually for the purpose of promoting their joint clothing venue with Hurley clothing.
lame.
no no... LAME.
weezer used to be so damn cool.
pinkerton and the blue album were icons from my formative years.
there's not a single person that i knew that didn't own the blue album.
it's a frigging classic.
and then they turned up the suck knob.
it happened gradually... first there was a hint of sucking, then a little more... then the next thing we knew, it's terrible novelty songs for entire albums.
they went the offspring route.
and that is just a BAD bad idea.
weezer went from being one of those bands that everyone loved, to being a band that no one can stand.
anything made by them in the last 6 years = instant radio turn off.
i don't know a single person that has bought their last few albums.
and now they have done the ultimate "sell out" move and quite literally SOLD themselves.
they sold the damn title of their album for product placement.
the weez is dead to me now.
way to go rivers. you fucked up.
hard.
nerd.
small failures
despite my new resolve, this week has been a bit of fail. i admit.
i have yet to run or exercise...
the last two mornings, when that alarm has gone off, my body has given me the firm NO on getting up.
so instead of giving myself a hard time and making it happen, i've been giving in.
but, i think i have some okay excuses.
first off, that ankle issue seems to have worked itself out for now, but i don't want to push it too soon.
second, in the last 5 or so days, i've been having some very strange and somewhat concerning heart palpitations.
they were really bad on saturday and sunday. like, happening every half hour or more for the entire day.
in the last 2 days they've eased up, but haven't stopped.
i've never experienced anything like this, so i'm not exactly sure what to think, but i am concerned enough that i'm going to the doctor about it tomorrow.
i have been trying to take care of myself. no smoking, eating pretty well...
but i figured it wouldn't kill me to take it easy until i get looked at.
so it's a decent excuse i think.
anyways, tomorrow and thursday i have some swimming dates planned, so that's cool... but it looks like a might not get a run in until friday, best case scenario.
because morning is really my only run time. i'm not down with the evening exercise. too many people around. is that weird?
i like my solitary runs where i rarely see another human.
but i digress.
so, once again, i have been reminded that people read what i write here and take it far too personally and out of context. le sigh.
i'm torn.
i hate censoring myself, and i don't want to have a secret private blog that no one i know can read... (thats called a diary)
but i also hate that sometimes people read what i write and assume its about them, or assume that i'm alluding to something that i'm not.
and i hate even more that i might be hurting feelings that i don't mean to.
so i'm in a tough spot.
but at the end of the day, this space is mine.
i write things about me and how i feel and its not really for or to anyone else.
everything i my interpretation of the world and what i see...
its my reality.
and as easy as it is for me to brush everything off and just think that people that are going to read into things for whatever reasons and in whatever ways and i can't control that...
but i suppose on some level i have a certain responsibility to sensor myself in order to play nice in the sandbox.
even though my natural tendency is to speak my mind loudly and often.
also, i really want to remind people how out of context writing can be taken.
especially on the internet.
just because you READ into something, doesn't mean it was WRITTEN that way.
ya dig?
big sigh.
so ya, that shit is fun.
part of the reason that i blog so freely (and often) is that i grew up with a diary.
so speaking freely and from the heart is kinda how i write.
but no one used to read my diary but me.
and now everyone does.
including people i don't like and wouldn't share things with.
and i should try to remember that.
okay, enough.
shit happens and thats life.
should be used to this by now... been down this road like 12 times already, lol.
so this weekend i'm pretty stoked about seeing joan jett at the pne with a whole whack of my ladies.
i hope its sunny.
and i hope i get to see the superdogs. they're my favourite part of the pne.
also, i want to drink a root beer from the big barrel thing and eat a fischer scone and maybe something else sinful.
i kinda love the pne.
i worked there for 5 years, so i know if front to back.
which is awesome because i know all the secret washrooms.
and despite spending so much time there, i still love it.
it was a fun job and i was good at it.
and i loved spending my breaks wandering around and seeing everything.
truth be told, i haven't been on a ride there during the pne since i was a little kid.
i'm not really a huge ride lover... they're okay, but i like wandering around and seeing the farm displays and the animals and the food stands and stuff.
so on friday i'll have about 3 hours to spend at the pne, which isn't long enough, but it might be the best i can squeeze out for this year.
unless i can talk the hubby into going on sunday with me.
ya right, lol.
i have yet to run or exercise...
the last two mornings, when that alarm has gone off, my body has given me the firm NO on getting up.
so instead of giving myself a hard time and making it happen, i've been giving in.
but, i think i have some okay excuses.
first off, that ankle issue seems to have worked itself out for now, but i don't want to push it too soon.
second, in the last 5 or so days, i've been having some very strange and somewhat concerning heart palpitations.
they were really bad on saturday and sunday. like, happening every half hour or more for the entire day.
in the last 2 days they've eased up, but haven't stopped.
i've never experienced anything like this, so i'm not exactly sure what to think, but i am concerned enough that i'm going to the doctor about it tomorrow.
i have been trying to take care of myself. no smoking, eating pretty well...
but i figured it wouldn't kill me to take it easy until i get looked at.
so it's a decent excuse i think.
anyways, tomorrow and thursday i have some swimming dates planned, so that's cool... but it looks like a might not get a run in until friday, best case scenario.
because morning is really my only run time. i'm not down with the evening exercise. too many people around. is that weird?
i like my solitary runs where i rarely see another human.
but i digress.
so, once again, i have been reminded that people read what i write here and take it far too personally and out of context. le sigh.
i'm torn.
i hate censoring myself, and i don't want to have a secret private blog that no one i know can read... (thats called a diary)
but i also hate that sometimes people read what i write and assume its about them, or assume that i'm alluding to something that i'm not.
and i hate even more that i might be hurting feelings that i don't mean to.
so i'm in a tough spot.
but at the end of the day, this space is mine.
i write things about me and how i feel and its not really for or to anyone else.
everything i my interpretation of the world and what i see...
its my reality.
and as easy as it is for me to brush everything off and just think that people that are going to read into things for whatever reasons and in whatever ways and i can't control that...
but i suppose on some level i have a certain responsibility to sensor myself in order to play nice in the sandbox.
even though my natural tendency is to speak my mind loudly and often.
also, i really want to remind people how out of context writing can be taken.
especially on the internet.
just because you READ into something, doesn't mean it was WRITTEN that way.
ya dig?
big sigh.
so ya, that shit is fun.
part of the reason that i blog so freely (and often) is that i grew up with a diary.
so speaking freely and from the heart is kinda how i write.
but no one used to read my diary but me.
and now everyone does.
including people i don't like and wouldn't share things with.
and i should try to remember that.
okay, enough.
shit happens and thats life.
should be used to this by now... been down this road like 12 times already, lol.
so this weekend i'm pretty stoked about seeing joan jett at the pne with a whole whack of my ladies.
i hope its sunny.
and i hope i get to see the superdogs. they're my favourite part of the pne.
also, i want to drink a root beer from the big barrel thing and eat a fischer scone and maybe something else sinful.
i kinda love the pne.
i worked there for 5 years, so i know if front to back.
which is awesome because i know all the secret washrooms.
and despite spending so much time there, i still love it.
it was a fun job and i was good at it.
and i loved spending my breaks wandering around and seeing everything.
truth be told, i haven't been on a ride there during the pne since i was a little kid.
i'm not really a huge ride lover... they're okay, but i like wandering around and seeing the farm displays and the animals and the food stands and stuff.
so on friday i'll have about 3 hours to spend at the pne, which isn't long enough, but it might be the best i can squeeze out for this year.
unless i can talk the hubby into going on sunday with me.
ya right, lol.
getting back to nature
i think i'm going to sum up last weekend as being "soul recharging"
because when i came home yesterday, i felt full to the brim with happiness and the overwhelming feeling of being content.
beyond the company that i kept and the things we did...
a large part of it was simply spending time in the sunshine and near the water.
i'm a water baby, most definitely.
and just being near the ocean or a lake brightens my day.
and this is why, much to my husbands chagrin, i will never move to chilliwack and be land locked.
also what made me happy is that this weekend wasn't about getting shitfaced.
i mean, don't get me wrong, i got my drink on friday night... and then some...
but saturday i just sipped away on wine, fine champagne, a little vodka... and stayed for the most part, totally sober.
and it was great.
we hung out on the patio in the sunshine and chatted...
there were games of bocce ball...
we made a beautiful dinner, full of fresh ingredients and healthy goodness... well, except that garlic bread, but hey, it can't be resisted.
and we sat around the patio table and enjoyed eachothers company.
then we brought the fun inside and spent 3 hours playing board games and laughing really hard.
i know, from the outside it may sound tragically lame, but it was truly wonderful.
and instead of going home feeling destroyed from a weekend of partying hard, i felt recharged.
and it's been a really long time since i've felt that way on a sunday.
which, may be the sign of a problem.
as such, the conversation with my hubby has turned to maybe taking it easy on the sauce for a bit.
i think i might be at the place where i'm considering quitting smoking soon.
its expensive, which is starting to wear on me... and its not making me feel great like it used to.
at the very least, i'm into cutting back to weekends only.
the booze is always the harder thing for me to cut back on.
not getting drunk isn't a problem.
but not drinking at all is.
i am very susceptible to the "one drink" mentality.
one drink here... one drink there... but not necessarily getting shittered.
but really... what am i accomplishing? not much.
i'm taking in these empty calories and really, i'd probably be just as happy with a glass of good iced tea.
and i'm spending a lot of money on it.
my husband and i spend a LOT on booze each month.
like, hundreds of dollars.
this could be our vacation if we stopped drinking every weekend.
i was also really inspired this weekend by my best friend's best friend.
she's turned her mentality and her lifestyle completely around in the last 3 years and its been amazing to watch.
she went from being a pretty solid smoker & drinker to being the kinda dame that treats her body like a temple.
and while i have no interest in adopting all of her techniques (sorry, but going vegan won't happen for me, i love my meat too much) but her overall philosophy of putting a lot of thought into what goes in is really inspiring.
i have no other word for it.
i was absolutely inspired.
it helps that she's a wonderful open lady and so its never preachy or being forced on anyone... so it makes it easy to peer into her world and be a little envious that shes mastered this fine art of taking care of herself.
so as all of these thoughts churned in my brains, i decided that i'm going to make some pretty substantial changes.
i'm not into setting goals or targets and restrictions.
lets just say that from here on in i am inspired to really think about whats going in.
and that includes smoking and drinking.
and that will mean that those two activities decrease.
i'm feeling the need to get back to nature.
this summer i haven't been smoking much weed at all. but i've been heavy on the sauce.
this has been a mistake.
i'm thinking its time to get back to green.
it's cheaper, much less harmful for me and frankly, more enjoyable.
it doesn't make me feel like shit the next day.
which is the biggest part.
when i have a heavy drinking night, it robs me of the next day.
and that sucks.
i only get 2 days off a week and i don't want to spend one of them laying on the couch feeling like a sack of shit.
i've wasted enough days like that.
and don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with a lovely lazy day on the couch, but its nice when they happens because i want them to, not because i can't physically do anything else.
but if i smoke the good stuff, i'm not hungover, dehydrated and shitty feeling the next day.
in fact, i feel perfectly normal.
weed = win.
my husband's best friend is of this mentality... and i dig it.
smokes a lot o' the ganga and gets his drink on from time to time...
but quit smoking years ago, eats vegetarian... is pretty contentious about what what he puts in...
and i think it's the way forward for me.
i used to live this way, and somehow over the last few years i really have shifted more into the booze realm.
but believe it or not, even 5 years ago, i didn't drink nearly as much as i do now.
in fact, currently i'm at my all time high for liquor consumption.
and thats not a fact i wear with pride right now.
10 years ago, i barely drank at all.
drinking was a once a month (or less) occurrence when i hung out with non pot smokers.
which was really rare. birds of a feather... you know...
i actually didn't even smoke many cigarettes.
and i felt miles better on the average weekend than i do now.
i used to go out on adventures... roll up a fatty and go on a walk...
relax, get back to nature etc.
but in all reality, the huge difference was that instead of being prone to sit on my ass on a patio and shovel booze into my face and only move from chair to fridge to bathroom, repeat.
i wanted to wander trails. i wanted to swim in lakes. i wanted to walk up rivers and see nature and enjoy the world around me.
now, i definitely recognize that i don't *need* to get with the green in order to do these things...
but choosing that as my drug of choice instead of drugging myself with alcohol certainly gets me closer to my goals.
so... in closing, booze and i aren't necessarily breaking up, but we are going on a break.
and i'm totally breaking up with binge drinking.
and falling in love with weed all over again.
because when i came home yesterday, i felt full to the brim with happiness and the overwhelming feeling of being content.
beyond the company that i kept and the things we did...
a large part of it was simply spending time in the sunshine and near the water.
i'm a water baby, most definitely.
and just being near the ocean or a lake brightens my day.
and this is why, much to my husbands chagrin, i will never move to chilliwack and be land locked.
also what made me happy is that this weekend wasn't about getting shitfaced.
i mean, don't get me wrong, i got my drink on friday night... and then some...
but saturday i just sipped away on wine, fine champagne, a little vodka... and stayed for the most part, totally sober.
and it was great.
we hung out on the patio in the sunshine and chatted...
there were games of bocce ball...
we made a beautiful dinner, full of fresh ingredients and healthy goodness... well, except that garlic bread, but hey, it can't be resisted.
and we sat around the patio table and enjoyed eachothers company.
then we brought the fun inside and spent 3 hours playing board games and laughing really hard.
i know, from the outside it may sound tragically lame, but it was truly wonderful.
and instead of going home feeling destroyed from a weekend of partying hard, i felt recharged.
and it's been a really long time since i've felt that way on a sunday.
which, may be the sign of a problem.
as such, the conversation with my hubby has turned to maybe taking it easy on the sauce for a bit.
i think i might be at the place where i'm considering quitting smoking soon.
its expensive, which is starting to wear on me... and its not making me feel great like it used to.
at the very least, i'm into cutting back to weekends only.
the booze is always the harder thing for me to cut back on.
not getting drunk isn't a problem.
but not drinking at all is.
i am very susceptible to the "one drink" mentality.
one drink here... one drink there... but not necessarily getting shittered.
but really... what am i accomplishing? not much.
i'm taking in these empty calories and really, i'd probably be just as happy with a glass of good iced tea.
and i'm spending a lot of money on it.
my husband and i spend a LOT on booze each month.
like, hundreds of dollars.
this could be our vacation if we stopped drinking every weekend.
i was also really inspired this weekend by my best friend's best friend.
she's turned her mentality and her lifestyle completely around in the last 3 years and its been amazing to watch.
she went from being a pretty solid smoker & drinker to being the kinda dame that treats her body like a temple.
and while i have no interest in adopting all of her techniques (sorry, but going vegan won't happen for me, i love my meat too much) but her overall philosophy of putting a lot of thought into what goes in is really inspiring.
i have no other word for it.
i was absolutely inspired.
it helps that she's a wonderful open lady and so its never preachy or being forced on anyone... so it makes it easy to peer into her world and be a little envious that shes mastered this fine art of taking care of herself.
so as all of these thoughts churned in my brains, i decided that i'm going to make some pretty substantial changes.
i'm not into setting goals or targets and restrictions.
lets just say that from here on in i am inspired to really think about whats going in.
and that includes smoking and drinking.
and that will mean that those two activities decrease.
i'm feeling the need to get back to nature.
this summer i haven't been smoking much weed at all. but i've been heavy on the sauce.
this has been a mistake.
i'm thinking its time to get back to green.
it's cheaper, much less harmful for me and frankly, more enjoyable.
it doesn't make me feel like shit the next day.
which is the biggest part.
when i have a heavy drinking night, it robs me of the next day.
and that sucks.
i only get 2 days off a week and i don't want to spend one of them laying on the couch feeling like a sack of shit.
i've wasted enough days like that.
and don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with a lovely lazy day on the couch, but its nice when they happens because i want them to, not because i can't physically do anything else.
but if i smoke the good stuff, i'm not hungover, dehydrated and shitty feeling the next day.
in fact, i feel perfectly normal.
weed = win.
my husband's best friend is of this mentality... and i dig it.
smokes a lot o' the ganga and gets his drink on from time to time...
but quit smoking years ago, eats vegetarian... is pretty contentious about what what he puts in...
and i think it's the way forward for me.
i used to live this way, and somehow over the last few years i really have shifted more into the booze realm.
but believe it or not, even 5 years ago, i didn't drink nearly as much as i do now.
in fact, currently i'm at my all time high for liquor consumption.
and thats not a fact i wear with pride right now.
10 years ago, i barely drank at all.
drinking was a once a month (or less) occurrence when i hung out with non pot smokers.
which was really rare. birds of a feather... you know...
i actually didn't even smoke many cigarettes.
and i felt miles better on the average weekend than i do now.
i used to go out on adventures... roll up a fatty and go on a walk...
relax, get back to nature etc.
but in all reality, the huge difference was that instead of being prone to sit on my ass on a patio and shovel booze into my face and only move from chair to fridge to bathroom, repeat.
i wanted to wander trails. i wanted to swim in lakes. i wanted to walk up rivers and see nature and enjoy the world around me.
now, i definitely recognize that i don't *need* to get with the green in order to do these things...
but choosing that as my drug of choice instead of drugging myself with alcohol certainly gets me closer to my goals.
so... in closing, booze and i aren't necessarily breaking up, but we are going on a break.
and i'm totally breaking up with binge drinking.
and falling in love with weed all over again.
swim, swam, swum.
i managed to do an hour in the pool this morning.
pretty stoked about that.
but i'm not going to lie... if there hadn't have been my friend waiting for me to arrive and meet up at 6am, i wouldn't have made it.
i had some bad sleep last night.
just weird dreams and lots of waking up.
at 4am i pretty much cat napped for the last hour.
and at 5am when the alarm went, i REALLY wanted to turn it off and sleep until noon.
but, as always... once i was up and ready to rock, it was all good.
this morning the bulkhead was moved for the 50m pool configuration.
my first thought was one of excessive profanity.
50m pools are loooooong.
i had only ever trained in a 25m pool and am pretty used to the turns and pacing of it.
50m pools always make me feel like my first day of swimming lessons.
but theres some definite benefits for me.
first off, it means less stopping. and me and my partner have a habit of stopping often at the wall and briefly chatting.
hey, we're talkers. its in our nature.
so, two less stops for every 100m swam makes a solid difference in terms of distance covered for time spent in the pool.
also, given that i'm not really focusing on speed, i'm focusing on stroke technique and stretching out my body, distance swimming is ideal.
there's also a LOT less people in the pool at 6am.
so anyways, long story short, i'm down with the 6am swim schedule... even if it is a 50m pool, which normally would send me running and screaming in the other direction. and even though it is an ungodly hour to get up.
on days when i do a solid workout, i like to reward myself a little with my breakfast.
not anything that "undoes" the workout... but something that i LOVE that i couldn't eat every day.
enter... the white bagel.
oh glorious refined carbs. i know you're terrible for me, but i love you so.
this morning i went a little bigger than usual.
sesame seed bagel with a healthy slathering of light smoked salmon cream cheese (fun fact - light cream cheese has WAY less fat & calories than buttering your bagel. and it tastes like awesome)
then i topped it with some scrambled eggs that i did in the microwave (because i'm lazy) and topped with some chopped chives.
YUM.
generally my workout breakfast is just the bagel & cream cheese... meaning i get a bagel 2 or 3 times a week.
which satisfies my carb fiending nature, but keeps my ass in check. the self deal is; no workout = no bagel.
but anyways, i have this carton of egg beaters that i bought in the americas and decided that since it would take me all of 1 minute 20 seconds to make an egg go (which was, faster than my toaster) i may as well do it.
i'm not sure if my run will happen tomorrow to be honest.
all week my ankle has been hurting. yesterday it was really bad, so i went and bought a brace/support thing.
it feels a bazillion times better when its on, but it cuts off my circulation after a few hours.
any idea how long at a time you can wear one of those things?
anyways, how it feels tonight before bed will decide the fate of tomorrows run. and therefore tomorrows bagel.
oh look at that... time to go to work.
later.
pretty stoked about that.
but i'm not going to lie... if there hadn't have been my friend waiting for me to arrive and meet up at 6am, i wouldn't have made it.
i had some bad sleep last night.
just weird dreams and lots of waking up.
at 4am i pretty much cat napped for the last hour.
and at 5am when the alarm went, i REALLY wanted to turn it off and sleep until noon.
but, as always... once i was up and ready to rock, it was all good.
this morning the bulkhead was moved for the 50m pool configuration.
my first thought was one of excessive profanity.
50m pools are loooooong.
i had only ever trained in a 25m pool and am pretty used to the turns and pacing of it.
50m pools always make me feel like my first day of swimming lessons.
but theres some definite benefits for me.
first off, it means less stopping. and me and my partner have a habit of stopping often at the wall and briefly chatting.
hey, we're talkers. its in our nature.
so, two less stops for every 100m swam makes a solid difference in terms of distance covered for time spent in the pool.
also, given that i'm not really focusing on speed, i'm focusing on stroke technique and stretching out my body, distance swimming is ideal.
there's also a LOT less people in the pool at 6am.
so anyways, long story short, i'm down with the 6am swim schedule... even if it is a 50m pool, which normally would send me running and screaming in the other direction. and even though it is an ungodly hour to get up.
on days when i do a solid workout, i like to reward myself a little with my breakfast.
not anything that "undoes" the workout... but something that i LOVE that i couldn't eat every day.
enter... the white bagel.
oh glorious refined carbs. i know you're terrible for me, but i love you so.
this morning i went a little bigger than usual.
sesame seed bagel with a healthy slathering of light smoked salmon cream cheese (fun fact - light cream cheese has WAY less fat & calories than buttering your bagel. and it tastes like awesome)
then i topped it with some scrambled eggs that i did in the microwave (because i'm lazy) and topped with some chopped chives.
YUM.
generally my workout breakfast is just the bagel & cream cheese... meaning i get a bagel 2 or 3 times a week.
which satisfies my carb fiending nature, but keeps my ass in check. the self deal is; no workout = no bagel.
but anyways, i have this carton of egg beaters that i bought in the americas and decided that since it would take me all of 1 minute 20 seconds to make an egg go (which was, faster than my toaster) i may as well do it.
i'm not sure if my run will happen tomorrow to be honest.
all week my ankle has been hurting. yesterday it was really bad, so i went and bought a brace/support thing.
it feels a bazillion times better when its on, but it cuts off my circulation after a few hours.
any idea how long at a time you can wear one of those things?
anyways, how it feels tonight before bed will decide the fate of tomorrows run. and therefore tomorrows bagel.
oh look at that... time to go to work.
later.
who said dreams are free?
this morning i woke up cold.
which was AWESOME!
i hate that morning sweaty gross heat wave feeling.
so good thing our "heat wave" of like 3 days is over now.
apparently for the next few days its supposed to drop 5 degrees a day until hitting a low of 14 on saturday.
you aren't likely to hear me complain.
except that today is my best friend's birthday.
and that means saturday is to be her party.
and since its the big 3-0, there was a cabin trip planned to make things extra different and exciting.
and we all know that cabins were made for heat wave weather.
but thats okay.
no matter what, with the fine fine company, we're going to have a great time.
my best friend and i often have oceans between us.
not figuratively.
quite literally, for over half of our 10 year friendship, we have lived oceans apart.
in fact, right now, there's an ocean between us.
she's lived in australia, the uk and currently on vancouver island.
it sucks for me, but shes an adventurer.
it makes me super sad that we can't just hang out on weekdays and go for random lunches and go to the pool or for runs together...
but i know its always temporary.
as long as i stay put in vancouver, sooner or later she'll come back here for good.
thats my theory anyways.
the good thing though, is that our friendship doesn't suffer over distance.
we've written letters and sent silly packages. we email, text and phone.
we're in touch. no matter what.
anyways, there's about a million things i could say about my bestie, but i'll basically sum it up here.
in my 30 years, there have been oodles of girls and guys that i've referred to as my best friend.
some were amazing friends to me at the time... others were just the closest of the current crop.
but there's pretty much none that can come close to how good of a friend this girl has been to me.
over our 10+ years as friends, we've worked together at multiple jobs, dated the same guys, crushed on the same guys... experienced concerts, places, cities and had adventures together... gotten drunk, gotten high and partied our faces off... sat snuggled on couches watching movies and having girl talk. we've eaten, cooked and baked together. we've helped each other live better lives. we've encouraged and supported each other... even when we weren't sure exactly WTF the other one was doing.
we've experienced the majority of our adult lives together. even if it was across an ocean at times.
i love her dearly, she's absolutely changed my life for the better... and i'm proud to call her my best friend.
because not only is she *my* best friend... she's about *the* best friend a girl could ask for.
i love you cass!
happy 30th birthday friend.
and now... back to our regularly scheduled programing.
this morning was week 6, day 2 of couch 2 5k
and it went a little something like this:
5 minute warm up
10 minute run
3 minute walk
10 minute run
5 minute cool down
this was actually not feeling great on me this morning.
my ankle is sore, my knee was aching. and on the second interval of 10 minutes running, i did have to walk for about 10 seconds at the 5 minute mark because my ankle was in a bad place.
i was pretty bummed, because it was the very first time in 6 weeks that i've actually broken the program and walked when i wasn't supposed to.
i know it wasn't a big deal... wasn't like i walked for 2 minutes or anything... but still.
i really wanted to do this entire thing properly. i may have to redo today's workout on friday to make it a bit better in my brain.
tomorrow morning, i'm scheduled to go to the pool for 6am.
my swimming buddy and i have decided that this evening workout business is not really working for us. its great when we actually get there - that one time, lol... but its too easy to find excuses and reasons to bail on it.
so if we do it at 6am, there's no excuse.
and honestly, i far prefer to do my workouts in the morning for that exact reason.
after work is filled with distractions for me. i am not disciplined enough to say no to a patio beer because i have to workout. not even close.
but if its the first thing i do, then not only does it make me feel good all day, its something i can check off my list as done, and i don't have to stress over it.
well, not that i would actually stress over not working out, lol. but you know...
anyways... off to work. gotta make the money.
the husband and i have been hammering out the details on the september 2011 orlando/caribbean trip so that we can have a ballpark of total cost.
that way we can save appropriately and not end up having to cut corners and scrimp. we want to go balls out on this one. we're thinking probably $10,000 total is what we'll need.
one week in orlando doing only theme parks will cost us in the $5,000 - $6,000 range... and then we've got it narrowed down to either one week at Sandals in Antigua (which is voted the most romantic place in the world) or 3 days in St Maarten and 4 days in Anguilla.
this means we literally have to find a way to save at least $400 each per month for the next year to make it go.
and if we come in under budget, the additional saved will go to the "one week in vegas" fund. for May 2011.
either way, i gotta get busy.
and for everyone that has and does send me referrals, i frigging love you.
you're funding my dreams. and that makes you pretty damn awesome.
which was AWESOME!
i hate that morning sweaty gross heat wave feeling.
so good thing our "heat wave" of like 3 days is over now.
apparently for the next few days its supposed to drop 5 degrees a day until hitting a low of 14 on saturday.
you aren't likely to hear me complain.
except that today is my best friend's birthday.
and that means saturday is to be her party.
and since its the big 3-0, there was a cabin trip planned to make things extra different and exciting.
and we all know that cabins were made for heat wave weather.
but thats okay.
no matter what, with the fine fine company, we're going to have a great time.
my best friend and i often have oceans between us.
not figuratively.
quite literally, for over half of our 10 year friendship, we have lived oceans apart.
in fact, right now, there's an ocean between us.
she's lived in australia, the uk and currently on vancouver island.
it sucks for me, but shes an adventurer.
it makes me super sad that we can't just hang out on weekdays and go for random lunches and go to the pool or for runs together...
but i know its always temporary.
as long as i stay put in vancouver, sooner or later she'll come back here for good.
thats my theory anyways.
the good thing though, is that our friendship doesn't suffer over distance.
we've written letters and sent silly packages. we email, text and phone.
we're in touch. no matter what.
anyways, there's about a million things i could say about my bestie, but i'll basically sum it up here.
in my 30 years, there have been oodles of girls and guys that i've referred to as my best friend.
some were amazing friends to me at the time... others were just the closest of the current crop.
but there's pretty much none that can come close to how good of a friend this girl has been to me.
over our 10+ years as friends, we've worked together at multiple jobs, dated the same guys, crushed on the same guys... experienced concerts, places, cities and had adventures together... gotten drunk, gotten high and partied our faces off... sat snuggled on couches watching movies and having girl talk. we've eaten, cooked and baked together. we've helped each other live better lives. we've encouraged and supported each other... even when we weren't sure exactly WTF the other one was doing.
we've experienced the majority of our adult lives together. even if it was across an ocean at times.
i love her dearly, she's absolutely changed my life for the better... and i'm proud to call her my best friend.
because not only is she *my* best friend... she's about *the* best friend a girl could ask for.
i love you cass!
happy 30th birthday friend.
and now... back to our regularly scheduled programing.
this morning was week 6, day 2 of couch 2 5k
and it went a little something like this:
5 minute warm up
10 minute run
3 minute walk
10 minute run
5 minute cool down
this was actually not feeling great on me this morning.
my ankle is sore, my knee was aching. and on the second interval of 10 minutes running, i did have to walk for about 10 seconds at the 5 minute mark because my ankle was in a bad place.
i was pretty bummed, because it was the very first time in 6 weeks that i've actually broken the program and walked when i wasn't supposed to.
i know it wasn't a big deal... wasn't like i walked for 2 minutes or anything... but still.
i really wanted to do this entire thing properly. i may have to redo today's workout on friday to make it a bit better in my brain.
tomorrow morning, i'm scheduled to go to the pool for 6am.
my swimming buddy and i have decided that this evening workout business is not really working for us. its great when we actually get there - that one time, lol... but its too easy to find excuses and reasons to bail on it.
so if we do it at 6am, there's no excuse.
and honestly, i far prefer to do my workouts in the morning for that exact reason.
after work is filled with distractions for me. i am not disciplined enough to say no to a patio beer because i have to workout. not even close.
but if its the first thing i do, then not only does it make me feel good all day, its something i can check off my list as done, and i don't have to stress over it.
well, not that i would actually stress over not working out, lol. but you know...
anyways... off to work. gotta make the money.
the husband and i have been hammering out the details on the september 2011 orlando/caribbean trip so that we can have a ballpark of total cost.
that way we can save appropriately and not end up having to cut corners and scrimp. we want to go balls out on this one. we're thinking probably $10,000 total is what we'll need.
one week in orlando doing only theme parks will cost us in the $5,000 - $6,000 range... and then we've got it narrowed down to either one week at Sandals in Antigua (which is voted the most romantic place in the world) or 3 days in St Maarten and 4 days in Anguilla.
this means we literally have to find a way to save at least $400 each per month for the next year to make it go.
and if we come in under budget, the additional saved will go to the "one week in vegas" fund. for May 2011.
either way, i gotta get busy.
and for everyone that has and does send me referrals, i frigging love you.
you're funding my dreams. and that makes you pretty damn awesome.